dementia 13

francis coppola (the godfather saga) directed "dementia 13" when he was just 22 years old.  at 22, i was living in my childhood bedroom, letting my mom do my laundry, and working a few hours at the local grocery store.  and now 25, i've only just figured out what i want to do with my life and i'm taking a few baby steps in that direction.  i'm certainly not directing my first movie!  i'll give him kudo-points just for that feat!  but let us forget the glamor of a name for a moment and judge this movie on its merits alone.

the acting is... well it's tolerable.  it's hard to appropriately critique the acting in these classic movies.  what would be incredibly cheesy by today's standards was probably not bad for its time.  i've watched a lot of ancient b&w horror movies lately and this ain't the worst!  the writing is bad and some of the lines fall short of their mark but that's to be expected in the horror genre so i'm giving that aspect a B-.  the cinematography is pretty damn good.  it's actually better than some of the "new" horror movies i've seen lately.  you can see the makings a great director in this film.

and bonus kudos... at one point, a character remarks "especially an american girl.  you can tell she's been raised on promises."  i'm not really sure if these lines have anything to do with the opening line in tom petty's "american girl" (1977) but i'd say it's a good possibility since this movie was made in 1963... and the quote's almost exact!  worth mentioning at least.  

and a quick summary of the plot (recounted in a mundane fashion to indicate triviality)... there's a man who comes from money and i don't think he gets along with his wife.  they go to ireland to visit his wealthy family.  one night, he takes her on a boat ride and tells her that if he dies, she'll get nothing (the jerk!).  then he keeps rowing so fast that he has a heart attack and the dumb bastard forgot his medicine.  it almost seems that he does this on purpose just to make sure she gets nothing.  now that's some serious spite!  so his wife, wanting a taste of the family fortune, tosses his body in the pond and forges a letter from him stating he had to go back to america.  she does this so she'll have time to convince her mother-in-law to adapt her will (the legal document) so she can get some of the family fortune.  well that's no small feat!  no siree bob!  the mother-in-law is one tough cookie and she's way too busy mourning the death of her daughter who drowned in the pond years ago.  well someone wants everyone dead i guess because people keep dying.  and then someone finds out who it is... and then we all find out who it is!  hoooray!  

now that i think of it, this movie is fuuuuull of plot holes (or, really, just dumb plot parts) but the entertaining qualities still exist.  i recommend this movie if you're trying to make your way through a boxset of 50 classic horror movies; compared to the other 49 movies, it would stand out a little bit.  but if you're looking for something to watch on a friday night, look elsewhere.